Sunday, January 13, 2013


A faint crackle of distant thunder came from somewhere in the northwestern Wilderness. TG (pronounced teej) leaned against the dorm seemingly not to notice. Taking one last drag off of his hand-rolled Bugler cigarette, he pushed himself away from the building. Fixing his gold-plated sunglasses with one hand, a pair said to have been given to him by “the King” himself, he pinched out the tiny cherry with his other hand. Without turning around, he threw the butt behind him, and popped his collar just as it swished cleanly into a nearby garbage can. The roller party later tonight actually had him kind of excited, something that was rare for him anymore, but that was still a long way away. Right now he had much more important business. If his source was right, and she always was, the most interesting “fresh meat” he was ever going to meet would be showing up nearby soon.
            TG’s mind wandered to his time as a freshman, recalling the acne, the glasses, and the girls . . . he shivered recalling his deep, dark, unfortunate past. That was many, many moons ago and he had buried that green boy a long time ago. The man in the red velour suit had quite literately all the confidence in the world. Maybe it was his overly long tenure in Professor Brewenstein’s oenology class, maybe it was his short stint as a roadie for Jefferson Aeroplane, maybe it was the girls . . . not that it mattered. As he stood facing the woods in the direction of the thunder, a bewildered young man stumbled out of the woods. Wearing overly tight jeans (no flair, hmm), strange kicks, and slight tendrils of smoke coming from his hair, TG knew in an instant this was his “fresh meat.”
            “Where am I?” the newcomer asked. Then drooped to all fours, puking violently.
            “That’s right buddy, better out than in” TG comforted him. “Release the evil. ‘Beer before liquor, never sicker.’ Didn’t you learn that as an undergrad?” As he heaved, yet half nodded, TG knew then that this “meat” was definitely going to be different.

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